Facebook cheating and other social network and digital cheating lead the way of cheating evidence according to 81% of the US’s top divorce attorneys per a survey conducted by the American Academy of Academic Lawyers.
Cheating never became more convenient. We arrived to a spike in digital cheating and now your Facebook cheating wife or husband can effortlessly connect with their affair partner undetected- well, at least for a little while.
Maybe you are the one who has not caught your spouse performing disloyal acts yet and you need some kind of “How to Catch a Cheating Husband Tips 101” report to uncover the truth.
Perhaps you are the one who already drove down that rocky road of discovering your spouse’s infidelity. It all started after you found mysterious receipts for jewelry or flowers- never to receive them. Or maybe you are the one who caught your wife red-handed leaving a hotel room with your best friend.
So at this point you are either the one entering the “joyful life” of living with a life-zapping adulterer or you sense the repeat offender is back to play with his or her bag of tricks. Either way- you feel the ground shaking beneath you from the emotional earthquake and you want answers.
Scan these humorous and sarcastic, but realistic red flag signs you’re dealing with a Facebook cheating wife or husband.
10 Alarm-Ringing Signs You’re Married to a Digital or Facebook Cheating Wife or Husband
1. Strange Friend Requests. No, you don’t know those strange people from the Facebook friend requests who live 300 miles away, but your wife’s boyfriend does and now Facebook is just doing what Facebook always does to connect her circle of friends with yours.
2. His Phone Caught a Cold. The biggest key how to catch a cheating husband or wife is noticing a sudden change in patterns. Did he blow out his speakers listening to Kenny G? Did his phone come down with laryngitis or catch a cold? Not likely? WTH? Why out of nowhere did his phone stop ringing- ALL THE TIME? They don’t want you to hear when a text arrives from their lover of course. He simply placed in on silent mode.
3. New Found Love of Walking. Again another pattern change. She never exercised before and now she is obsessed with it. She takes a walk down the street before work and when she comes HOME. Any excuse she can make to escape your view in order to Facebook message, text or call him.
4. Facebook Posting Addiction Pill. Some people suffer from Facebook posting addiction. They post that grainy pic of the hamburger they ate for lunch- that’s important news; they post a pic of every angle of their poodle wearing a hat and drop a famous (or never-heard-before quote) every hour. She did. Now she doesn’t. Did she find a cure for her addiction? No, but she sure isn’t going to post pics of hugging her boyfriend at the park for her friends and family to see.
5. Shrinking Bladder Syndrome. You wonder why he runs to the bathroom so often when he doesn’t eat that much. Is he finally cleaning? Did his bladder get smaller? Did he find the next new diet craze or is he consuming hours of Facebook chatting time with his new hot co-worker “friend”? You don’t even hear him tinkling. Does the pee just vaporize?
6. Facebook Server Malfunction. It happens. Servers malfunction and images go missing on websites. It happened to me a few weeks ago to my website, but I’m sure that doesn’t explain why all those images of you two on family vacations or romantic dinners together suddenly go missing. Deleting pics on Facebook is his/her attempt to prove to their affair partner that they like you less and their lover more. Will they end up happily ever after?
7. Lost Wifi Connection. “When I’m around he’s never connected to Facebook, and when I’m away he’s always connected,” you wonder. OK so it’s not faulty Wifi connection. It’s faulty romantic connection with you and he’s sneaking off during his lunch break pouting to his lover through Facebook how much he loves her and “things just aren’t same anymore” with you. I guess Wifi works fine at his job.
8. Sense of Humor Abducted by Aliens. She used to think you were the stand-up comic of the year, at least that’s how she made you feel when she laughed at every single one of your dry knock-knock jokes. I guess you just don’t have it anymore. Maybe it’s a sign of alien intrusion and they’re zapping you of your powers. Or maybe when she only seems to laugh and smile while Facebook chatting and texting it’s because she found the new comic of the year- her new boyfriend!
9. The Vanishing Phone Trick. “Check this out honey. Every time you enter the room I make my phone disappear.” No, your husband didn’t learn new cheesy magic wizardry. Don’t worry he’s not going to quit his job to become the next David Copperfield. You’ve got more important things to worry about like with whom he’s Facebook cheating and texting while you’re taking a shower.
10. Apparent Vitamin B Intake Increase. I read that vitamin B can help improve your memory. Maybe that explains his new ability to remember a whole slew of passwords. He never used to input passwords anything. The computer and phone saved them for all his accounts including his email and Facebook accounts, but he certainly can’t afford them to auto-populate on your shared laptop, tablet or his phone. He’s got secrets he’s hiding- and they’re not the latest research on how to obtain the memory of a recent MIT grad.
All jokes aside, this is no laughing matter. These are just a handful of signs your spouse is Facebook cheating or performing some kind of digital cheating behind your back.